Tell A Joke!

Tell a joke that happened in your life. Or tell a joke you saw or whatever it is, just tickle our funny bones, as long as you follow the forum rules.

Once I has standing in line to get back to class, there was this annoying boy next to me. Let's call him A. My partner in class was standing behind him, so let's call him J.

A: I'm a chicken! I'm a chicken! I'm a chicken!

Me: Keep quiet!

A: NO! I'm a chicken!

J: You're a chicken? Then I'm a cyclops. I come & eat you up. Now you're dead so keep quiet!

Here's an epic story of my close frenemy:
My classmate's phone was locked and she forgot the password. Him was trying to scare me even though it's not my fault.

Him: *scaring* Your dead!

Me: *scaring* Your fat!

Then, his cousin was trying to say something but he can't for he laughed so hard along with others and the two of us.

Oh my...

It's more of a friendly joke than an argument. He's my best frenemy.

---

Here's another one, and it just happened today!

Okay, so my father was mopping my room and he said:

F: Do you want to open the window?

M: Um.... No.

F: I said, do you want to open the window?!

M: Uh, no.

F: I SAID, DO YOU WANT TO OPEN THE WINDOW?!

M: I said no!

F: *laughs a bit* I thought you said 'what?'

Note: 'Ano' in English is 'What'.

My family listens to this radio station called Lite FM. Recently, Lite FM had this game called Star Wars where you vote for singers. & Michael Jackson won. So they had to play Michael Jackson songs all morning. Then, the conversation this morning.....

M: Papa, for the Lite FM Star Wars, Michael Jackson won!

F: *Grunts*

Soon....

Radio: *Plays Michael Jackson song*

F: Why are they playing so many Michael Jackson songs?

M: Because he won Lite FM's Star Wars.

Moments later...

Radio: *Plays another Michael Jackson song*

F: Why are they playing so many of his songs?

M: Because he won the Star Wars!!!

Near school...

Radio commercial: Lite FM's Star Wars winner is....Michael Jackson, as voted by you!

F: Oooh! Michael Jackson won, is it?

M: *very frustrated* Yeeeeeeesssssssss!!!!!!

Haha!

Today during break, I was looking for my friend Nat & I found her in the canteen. She needs her Earl Grey tea or she'll have a fit. Then...

M: Hey Nat!

N: *Waves*

Suddenly....

M: *Trips over a platform that I didn't notice & almost falls flat on my face* Ouch!

N: Wow, [insert my name], only you have the ability to trip on a flat surface!

That's silly!

I'm not silly!

Sorry!

I can't remember anything funny that happened to my life anymore.......

It's okay, dear! *Pats* On Friday, Lite FM has Free Plug Friday, where they interview & record an advertisement for people who left their day jobs to start their own businesses. So last week(I think), they made a commercial for this guy who runs a juice shop.


Shaz(Radio DJ): Steve! Why are you hitting the pineapple with a baseball bat??

Steve(Radio DJ): I'm trying to get the juice of the pineapple out!

Shaz: No need! Just order from[insert the guy's email & phone no as well as website]! It's nationwide too!

After commercial:

Shaz: Sooo....what do you think?

Guy: Um...my product is not nationwide.

Steve & Shaz: Oh......

Well...this has been pretty lonely.

*Radio playing 'Too Much Heaven'*

Me: Bubby(yeah, I call my dad that), did you know tht this song was originally sing my the Bee Gees?

Dad: Huh? *Driving with car window down*

Me: (Louder) Did you know that this song was originally sung by the Beee Gees???

Dad: Huh?

Me: DID YOU KNOW THAT THIS SONG WAS ORIGINALLY SUNG BY THE BEE GEES?????!!!?

Dad: Oh.

Musa_Eyre wrote:

Well...this has been pretty lonely.

My life ain't that fun, but, once I experienced something funny, I'll post in this topic right away!

Musa_Eyre wrote:

*Radio playing 'Too Much Heaven'*

Me: Bubby(yeah, I call my dad that), did you know tht this song was originally sing my the Bee Gees?

Dad: Huh? *Driving with car window down*

Me: (Louder) Did you know that this song was originally sung by the Beee Gees???

Dad: Huh? 

Me: DID YOU KNOW THAT THIS SONG WAS ORIGINALLY SUNG BY THE BEE GEES?????!!!?

Dad: Oh.

Haha! Classics!

Ooh! I can't wait to read it!

I am not that good at joke but this is what i got.

What did the alien say to the gas pump?

"Don't you know its rude to stick your finger in your ear when i am talking to you"

ROFL
Okay i got one more
You may have seen this one a lot or different versions of it but i thought it was funny.

There was these three aliens. They wanted to live on earth so they landed their space craft in Orlando, Florida. But they didn''t speak english. So the first alien went to an oprah and he learned the words ," mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi." The second alien went to a restaurant and she learned the words, " forks and knives, forks and knives." The the third alien went to a candy store and he learned the words," goody goody gumdrop!"
So on their second day on earth when they were walking on the side walk a cop pulls them over and says," Hey a guy was killed last night do you know who killed him?" Then the first alien says, " mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi," Then the cop says, " well what did you kill him with?" Then the second alien says, " forks and knives, forks and knives." Then the cop says , " well i''ll have to take you three downtown and the third alien says, "goody goody gumdrop!"

Okay one more, i promise

I heard a knock on my door, i opened the door and i had a box in my hand. I gave the knocker the box and then ran far away from where i was and the box exploded. It was a grenade. I then ran back, closed my door, locked it. A few minutes later, the same person knocked on my door. My jaw dropped to the ground. "Wait here", i said. I came back with a different box. "Happy birthday to you happy birthday to you, now take this present and i watch the fireworks, happy birthday to you", i sang as the person walked away from the house and then exploded. It was two grenade. two minutes later, he knocked on my door again. I banged my head on the door and yelled, "HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE!!!!". I gave him another box sang the song again but faster. Ran to my window and saw the box explode and then i walked away and he knocked on my door again. My eyes were glowing with anger and frustration, then the boy said" ahhhh, run away, run away". A few minutes later, he knocked on my door again. "ehhhhhhh! Whyyyyy. How are you still here! Have you learned nothing yet!", I yelled. Then i took out one more box with all different kinds of explotions in it and then it blew up. They knocked on my door once more and then i screamed and then i screamed and fainted.




LOL. That one may not be as funny but i tried.